DavidMeade.com » Guest Blog

Where the magic happens (navlopomo07-14)

Dave — Thu, 15 Nov 2007 00:43:21 +0000

Be cool, don't pass out!

Audra — Tue, 10 May 2005 16:19:51 +0000

A note from David: Today we have a very special treat, a guest blog from none other than DavidMeade.com regular, Audra!

Quote:

Anyway, I wanted to share my “gym” story from today. So I met with my trainer again today, and if you remember my last encounter with him, it was pretty scary. I could not stand up for very long after he had me do the squats and lunges. The rest of the training session was a blur. So this time I thought, damn it, I am going to do much better. I work out on a regular basis…..what is wrong with me…..I can do this!

The session starts off with me jumping rope. Okay….I don’t know about you, but I have not jumped rope since I was a kid and much much lighter. So as a kid, you could go FOREVER! He had me do 3 sessions of 1 minute each nonstop. MY GOD, that 1 minute felt like 20. I kept tripping up on the rope, then he kept counting down (which wasn’t helping), because when he would say 45 seconds left, in my head it felt like it should only be 10 seconds left. WHEW……I survived the rope.

Next onto boxing. He has me put on some boxing gloves and hit these pads that he holds, also not very cool with this one. I guess I just don’t see myself as very coordinated or something, but I feel silly doing this. Plus there are all these other people around doing their thing, and I am boxing (not well I might add). OKAY….2nd thing down.

Then……..the dreaded squats and lunges AGAIN! Started off okay (at least this time my legs weren’t shaking as much), but after about the 3rd set, I could not stop sweating. I mean it was literally dripping down – YUCK!. Started getting a little light headed, but DAMN IT, I CAN DO THIS! So I push through the rest of the sets, when low and behold, we start walking to a different section of the gym to start to work out my arms. Things start becoming a little blurry and white, and I am perspiring like you can’t believe. All I keep thinking is….don’t pass out, be cool, don’t pass out, be cool! I make it to the other section and try to be cool about sitting down for a minute and drinking some water…..when all of a sudden, I think he must have seen how pale I was. He said are you okay? I said, yeah I’m fine, just a little light headed. He said that is due to SOB…….I’m like WHAT????? He says SOB……shortness of breath. Yeah, no shit Sherlock – I can’t breath!

But I am determined to not let this get the best of me, so I persevere and continue on. However, this time when he is showing me new things that I can do, and the proper form, I am not paying as much attention to what he is saying……because in my head I keep thinking, don’t pass out, be cool, don’t pass out, be cool. I keep looking at him like I am really concentrating on what he is showing me, but I am really concentrating on staying ALIVE!

Needless to say, I survived the training session…..and now I am scared for Friday…….because it starts all over again. HELP ME JESUS!

When you know you are not at the Sears Tower

Gina — Thu, 28 Oct 2004 17:20:02 +0000

A note from David: Today we have a very special treat, a guest blog from none other than quoteboard leader Gina!

Oh holy crap, today i had my first “flashback from ‘nam” here at the Fed.

Or i should say “flashback from the Sears Tower post-911″.

Window washers….

Here at the Fed, they are real people hanging on ropes with industrial

sized toilet plunger looking things on their hands. Today is the first

time i have seen them….

I sit across from a window, where i do not look directly at it, but can see

out of it with my She-Ra like peripheral vision.

Today i am nicely focusing on some Security Operating Procedure that i have put off for a few weeks and drinking some coffee..

WHEN OUT OF NOWHERE SPIDEY COMES BUSTING DOWN ON THE WINDOW! he has one ghetto-a** looking rope and giant toilet plugger hands!!!!!!!!!!

I jumped about six feet, let out a grunt scream/yelp, snorted coffee into

my nose and about peed myself. And, i am embarrassed to say, that i

thought “uni-bomber” immediately. Why or HOW “uni-bomber”, I am not sure, and i don’t know if it is safe to analyze my thought process… But terror is terror and that is all i have to say about that.

So as the lady that sits behind me looks at me like i have 3 green heads

and a polka-dotted antenna, she says “it is a window washer”.

Me: “yea, i know”

Lady: “have you never seen one before”

Me: “yea”

And that is when i realize, no.. no Spidey has never lunged himself at the

window near me before….

a.) Dave and I used to watch in horror and shock as the spideys across the way dangled from their crack coated rope (why else would one chose to do that?) in the winter months to wash windows….

b.) The Sears Tower had a machine that washed windows… that same machine that post 911 sent the entire Sears Tower building running down the stairs into the streets to save themselves.

c.) Aon doesn’t clean anything.. let alone a window. they have “please

don’t pee in the stairs” signs posted in the parking garage.

So no, this was a new experience… and i thought all of you needed to share in it.

And a good take away is: window washers are scary scary things…